What are friends for?
This has been a typical tag line for a lot of people over the period of time. I've heard a lot of people say this to their friends, however the reasons being different. Today as I write this I dwell to find out the reasons why people would use this line. Some recent events which include some recent conversations with my friends have made me think a lot as to when to use this line. My understanding till now was to use this when you have helped a friend and your friend tells you "Hey buddy thanks for the favor man!!" and then you come up with this line; "Hey dude, afterall what are friends for". However, this understanding now stands questioned by a certain set of events.
This post goes out to all my friends and blogger colleagues :) and I ask for their comments in the form of an answer to one question; "Would you afford to loose a group of friends for another friend?". Let me elaborate a bit before people start feeling dizzy after reading the shit I wrote above.
Two weeks ago I got a call from a close friend of mine in Boston. He told me about this girl Priya who is a part of their friend circle for the past 4 months and they all used to hang out together have fun, watch movies and always be there for each other. All of a sudden a friend of hers (Abhinav) comes into the picture (not part of the group) and gets close to her. Big deal, whats the big issue; the issue is that Abhinav is well known for being a bad guy and that Priya's friends have not had a good experience with him. Abhinav also is well known to talk to guys rudely and sweetly to girls. Abhinav doesn't treat Priya's friends properly and talks to them disrespectfully. Now comes the actual "action sequence", Priya's friends ask her to stay away from this guy, however Priya has got close to Abhinav and is spending a lot of time with him. Infact she doesn't have time for her other friends. So couple of her friends from the group sit down and explain her a couple of times that what she is doing is not good and that they dont want her to do so. She however starts defending Abhinav and doesn't stop hanging out with him. Priya's friends decide that they gonna stop talking to her and maybe she will understand on her own. Meanwhile, the student community where all these people stay start noticing that Priya is roaming around with different guys all the time and as always rumors start spreading about her nature and character and what kinda girl she is and all that crap. Priya's friends come to know of this and they feel bad, since people are talking about their friend in this manner. They decide to approach her and tell her whats happening so that she can do something about it.
Now comes the turn of tables, Priya after being repetitively told about the rumors and talks ignores them and keeps hanging out with Abhinav. Infact, she blames her friends that they have stopped talking to her after listening to all these rubbish talks and that if they were true friends they wouldn't have given a damn to all this. Now comes my question for you guys "What are friends for?" What was it that you could have done to save Priya's reputation from getting spoilt and getting her back in the group as everyone was missing her? Her friends told her about what people were talking about her, was that a correct move?
My exams got over yesterday and I called my friend in Boston asking him whats the status of the whole scene. He had this for me in store. Priya has stopped talking to all her friends in the group one of whom happens to be her roomie. The atmosphere in their house has become tense. Priya's other friends from the group feel lonely since the whole thing has swept them like a tide. They don't even see each others faces. The last time my friend spoke to her she said "I would like to move on and make new friends. I have friends who are with me when I need them and it seems I was not worth you guys". So bottomline, Priya is moving on forgetting all the happy and sad moments shared between all of em. I have just one thought after all this, "How can this girl afford to loose such gem of friends and mind you friends not a friend, for a guy who disrespects Priya's friends?" If I would have had a friend who disrespects my other friends, I would have definitely fired his ass :).
That's pretty much about it guys. I know this sounds like a stupid post and unlike my other ones but then yes this incidence really made me ponder on what are friends for and that's what my blog is all about "Points to ponder!!".
Adios
$warup
This post goes out to all my friends and blogger colleagues :) and I ask for their comments in the form of an answer to one question; "Would you afford to loose a group of friends for another friend?". Let me elaborate a bit before people start feeling dizzy after reading the shit I wrote above.
Two weeks ago I got a call from a close friend of mine in Boston. He told me about this girl Priya who is a part of their friend circle for the past 4 months and they all used to hang out together have fun, watch movies and always be there for each other. All of a sudden a friend of hers (Abhinav) comes into the picture (not part of the group) and gets close to her. Big deal, whats the big issue; the issue is that Abhinav is well known for being a bad guy and that Priya's friends have not had a good experience with him. Abhinav also is well known to talk to guys rudely and sweetly to girls. Abhinav doesn't treat Priya's friends properly and talks to them disrespectfully. Now comes the actual "action sequence", Priya's friends ask her to stay away from this guy, however Priya has got close to Abhinav and is spending a lot of time with him. Infact she doesn't have time for her other friends. So couple of her friends from the group sit down and explain her a couple of times that what she is doing is not good and that they dont want her to do so. She however starts defending Abhinav and doesn't stop hanging out with him. Priya's friends decide that they gonna stop talking to her and maybe she will understand on her own. Meanwhile, the student community where all these people stay start noticing that Priya is roaming around with different guys all the time and as always rumors start spreading about her nature and character and what kinda girl she is and all that crap. Priya's friends come to know of this and they feel bad, since people are talking about their friend in this manner. They decide to approach her and tell her whats happening so that she can do something about it.
Now comes the turn of tables, Priya after being repetitively told about the rumors and talks ignores them and keeps hanging out with Abhinav. Infact, she blames her friends that they have stopped talking to her after listening to all these rubbish talks and that if they were true friends they wouldn't have given a damn to all this. Now comes my question for you guys "What are friends for?" What was it that you could have done to save Priya's reputation from getting spoilt and getting her back in the group as everyone was missing her? Her friends told her about what people were talking about her, was that a correct move?
My exams got over yesterday and I called my friend in Boston asking him whats the status of the whole scene. He had this for me in store. Priya has stopped talking to all her friends in the group one of whom happens to be her roomie. The atmosphere in their house has become tense. Priya's other friends from the group feel lonely since the whole thing has swept them like a tide. They don't even see each others faces. The last time my friend spoke to her she said "I would like to move on and make new friends. I have friends who are with me when I need them and it seems I was not worth you guys". So bottomline, Priya is moving on forgetting all the happy and sad moments shared between all of em. I have just one thought after all this, "How can this girl afford to loose such gem of friends and mind you friends not a friend, for a guy who disrespects Priya's friends?" If I would have had a friend who disrespects my other friends, I would have definitely fired his ass :).
That's pretty much about it guys. I know this sounds like a stupid post and unlike my other ones but then yes this incidence really made me ponder on what are friends for and that's what my blog is all about "Points to ponder!!".
Adios
$warup
Comments
with new acquaintances, in my opinion, it is such.
we meet people everyday, some stay in our minds longer than others, some affect us and some just don't.
everyday we form images of them, as we speak and watch and learn. constantly deleting and adding to that mental sketch. the more we like someone,the more is the erasing and changing of that image. and then comes a point that you have to make a deletion, because you have perceived it. but you just don't want to. because the image is perfect.
and you are troubled with every event that persuades you to make that change in that perfect mental sketch. you like the person and you wanna keep likin him\her. so you keep the image. but it allows the conflict.
then friendship happens.... when the mental image is changed accordingly, not because you have to, but because its now perfect to you. because you love it. and it happened just when you weren't forcing yourself either way. when you never have to overlook a shortcoming, but you may simply accept it.
and thank god for that! coz we are soooo not perfect!
i've been in a "these-friends-of-mine-don't-like-those-friends" situation, i think it's heartbreaking. there was bitterness. we kinda split. but lemme assure you, the ones who were friends, always found their ways back.
it will happen
always does
:)
cheers